The Captain's Cookbook, Part II

Ladies and Gentle Ben, it's once again time for...

THE CAPTAIN'S COOKBOOK
Applying a Services Oriented Architecture to Culinary Design Problems

Holy Hellfire Tacos
Prep time: 5 minutes (more if you like to rub spicy stuff in your eyes)
Cooking time: 15-20 minutes

Ingredients:

• Approx. 1 pound ground turkey, beef, chicken, pork, or Soylent Green
• 8-12 whole wheat or corn tortillas
• 1 package Ortega (or Old El Paso) taco seasoning
• 1 small bottle Ortega (or Old El Paso) taco sauce (try the green chili sauce for kicks)
• 4 bell peppers of varying colors
• 1 yellow or white onion
• 1-2 habanero peppers (2 = you're f'in crazy)
• 1 block of sharp cheddar cheese
• 1 cucumber, and maybe some tomatoes
• Some amount of lettuce, baby spinach, or other roughage

Cooking Instructions:

1. In some sort of frying pan that can also be used as a weapon, brown the meat and drain whatever fat is left from the pan.
2. While that's going on, cut the onions and non-habanero peppers into whatever combination of slices, chunks, and cubes you find most aesthetically appealing and sautee them for a bit. Whenever you decide that they're done, set them aside.
3. When the meat's all set and/or the spirit moves you, stir in the contents of the Ortega taco seasoning packet into the pan along with whatever amount of water it tells you to add (3/4 cup?), and let it simmer (covered) for 5-10 minutes.
4. Meanwhile, carefully cut up the habanero peppers into little bits, but for the love of God do not touch your eyes or any other exposed membrane for the next 48 hours unless you feel like entering a massive and completely indestructible world of pain!!!!(I suppose you could wear gloves while you cut the peppers, but that's cheating.)
5. Dump the habanero peppers into the pan and let everything simmer for a few minutes more -- maybe chop up some of the cucumber or try to discover a new prime number while you wait -- and then shut off the burner.
6. Fill the tortillas with some combination of taco meat, sauteed veggies, shredded cheese, chopped cucumbers/tomatoes, and leafy greens. Finish with taco sauce.
7. If you discovered a new prime number in Step 5, you might want to write it down and show it to someone.